Thanksgiving is a time to reflect, appreciate, feel gratitude and blessed for whatever we do have. Wishing you positive energy and good experiences on that day, whatever you are doing. Maybe you are celebrating on another day, that’s good too! If you are looking for 20 helpful hints on how to keep positive and conflict free when around relatives. Happy Thanksgiving, Much Love
If you are thinking about the stress that many people experience during Thanksgiving (and maybe other holiday times) including your own…here are a few things to remember to help you out:
Meditate before you go over or at least go slow and breath. Maybe you need to do this before you get out of the car if going to someone else’s house.
Stoplight technique: Green is good. When you notice feeling yellow, do what you need to go back to green so you don’t run to the red. Very difficult to not have others go red when we are already there.
Emotional Hijacking: go slowly so this doesn’t happen…because if it doesn’t you won’t be thinking clearly for 15-18 minutes (or up to 3-4 hours)
Take a break outside and get some air – it may be cold but even that will help in the moment
Change the dynamic in some positive way
Humor is best in these circumstances that is self-deprecating
Watch the consumption of alcohol (Thanksgiving day is known as the most violent in the home)
Avoid politics, religion, sex/gender discussions all together…so much to talk about or plan for
Don’t take the bait…someone may try to get you to talk about these subjects. Don’t.
Be on same page about what time you are leaving with anyone you went with that day.
Be careful if playing family football or soccer (or other) games…no hospital movements
Watch the world cup together (or football or a parade or something fun)
Try to find a way to help or ask for help in a way that won’t cause conflict
Plan to have a few “Disarming Statements” ready for those relatives you anticipate difficulties
Be positive before you go, do the positive self-talk
Know your boundaries so you don’t have to fight for them and can keep calm
Look for ways to laugh more
Decide together on a new tradition (might want to think this over before the discussion)
Try not to eat too much (very tough) so we don’t feel groggy or tangry (tired and angry)
Cherish the time together as we all don’t know how much time we have.
Have a great week and enjoy the day whatever you choose to do, wherever you are!
All my best and much love,
Dave
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